craving for change... a positive change...

"Sometimes I wish I could go back to the days when I was six and my biggest problem was what kind of dress to put on my Barbies or whether or not I had enough Lego's to build a fort." 

This year has just been so horrible for me, and it keeps getting worse. I've been craving for change, in a good way. I just hate these complications, I'm a simple person, I just want to lead a pretty simple life, so how come things get so complicated all the time. 

I just wish people will learn to mind their own business and just leave me alone. 

There's so much going on in my head I don't even know what they are. There are so many things i know i should do, and want to do, but just can't bring myself to put in to action. I feel like i've lost my way, lost myself... but just don't know where to start looking in order to find it. and i feel so damn restless all the time.

No, i don't want too much. I just need my life back. Myself back. Just what i had a year ago. Nothing much, nothing major.

Right now the only thing i seem to be doing is ramble like this, which is obviously not getting me anywhere. I hate feeling sorry for myself, but i just can't help it sometimes. What in the world has happened to me?  

I can't even seem to put up a decent enough post. sigh! 

I keep hoping and praying. very convenient, but yet that don't seem to be getting me anywhere either. 

I just want to feel at ease, i just want peace of my mind, i just want things to be simple and uncomplicated... i just want to be happy... is that really too much to hope for??!! 

well, at least i still haven't stopped lighting the candles!!!